OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
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