I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
