I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
did you just send me my own nude
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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