I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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