He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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