Tell her she can't have a vagina
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
