i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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