Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
