somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
