somebody snuck up and got me drunk
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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