Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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