Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
How external is "for external use only"?
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Randomize
