'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
