I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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