"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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