I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'm at about main and main street
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I AM VODKA MAN
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
