I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize