the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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