he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
