I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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