how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
organizing the empties. That sober.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
