my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
