I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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