so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
