No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
