Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
