alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize