Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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