508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
