Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Randomize
