You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
