Midget sex pt 2 tonight
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
me + whiskey = a bad person
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
