Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
