but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
My breasts were aching with rage.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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