just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
