Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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