My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
