So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
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ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.