The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Ladies don't puke and tell
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize