shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
ugly people sure do ruin things
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
