Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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