ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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