im having a threesome with these popsicles
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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