Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize