Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
