I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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