It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
