# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
