never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
