"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
